News You Can Lose

[Allen Smithee]

Gwyneth Paltrow is now Jewish.

 

[Grand Potentate]

Gwyneth Paltrow is now Jewish.

 

[OfficePants]

 

[Zé Ferreira]

Gwyneth Paltrow is now Jewish.

She consciously uncoupled from Jesus too? Sheesh.

 

[OfficePants]

She consciously uncoupled from Jesus too? Sheesh.

It's how you get ahead in Hollywood.

 

[OfficePants]

http://www.sbnation.com/nba/2014/2/...up-2014-canada-finland-basketball-angry-birds

Angry Birds maker basically bribed FIBA to put Finland in the Basketball World Cup

 

[Allen Smithee]

The Chick-Fil-A guy is dead.

 

[Russell Street]

Apple released a U2 removal tool because sane/tasteful but lazy/ignorant people needed an easy way to get rid of their unwanted free album.
http://www.bbc.com/news/technology-29208540

 

[Grand Potentate]

Hurricane ODILE wrecked Cabo yesterday:

 

[OfficePants]

Toke 'em up.

http://www.reuters.com/article/2014/09/18/us-usa-marijuana-districtofcolumbia-idUSKBN0HD2M220140918

 

[Russell Street]

http://philadelphia.cbslocal.com/20...-jamie-fox-to-head-nj-dept-of-transportation/
Gov. Christie Appoints Jamie Fox To Head NJ Dept. of Transportation

Note that it's Fox, not Foxx. Two different people.

 

[Grand Potentate]

This one's for you, Fwiffo
http://io9.com/this-hair-growing-laser-helmet-was-just-approved-by-the-1638533019

This Hair Growing Laser Helmet Was Just Approved By The FDA

 

[Grand Potentate]

People are rioting in Hong Kong over democracy. Some American send them a Skype and let them know its not all its cracked up to be.

 

[OfficePants]

You've kind of presented your own counterargument there. Democracy sucks, sure, but it obviously sucks less than the rest of forms of government.

I think that quote is attributed to Ben Franklin, no? I'm sure it was probably true back then, but now democracy just kinda sucks.

 

[Allen Smithee]

People are rioting in Hong Kong over democracy. Some American send them a Skype and let them know its not all its cracked up to be.

This just in: The United States is a republic.

 

[Grand Potentate]

Apparently, the Secret Service has just completely given up on trying to keep crazies away from Obama. First a fruitcake with a knife gets all the way into the WH. Now its come out that a guy with a gun and a history of assault and battery charges got let on to an elevator with him. Fuck.

 

[Allen Smithee]

^ What, no faith in Biden?

 

[Grand Potentate]

The pope is down with the homo's.

Predictably, American "conservative" Catholics are up in arms over this.

 

[Thruth]

The pope is down with the homo's.

Predictably, American "conservative" Catholics are up in arms over this.

of course they are up in arms. the only homos they will tolerate is within their clergy

 

[Zé Ferreira]

I doubt the pope is on board personally, probably more organizational pressure. Gotta keep the church hip.

 

[Grand Potentate]

I doubt the pope is on board personally, probably more organizational pressure. Gotta keep the church hip.

Actually, I think its the other way around. This pope has been surprisingly progressive and has publicly stated that he had little problem with gays.

 

[Allen Smithee]

The pope is down with the homo's.

Predictably, American "conservative" Catholics are up in arms over this.

Link? Typically he's just downplayed their sin as not being the worst thing around and not deserving center stage.

 

[Thruth]

http://www.cbc.ca/m/news/topstories/catholic-church-makes-stunning-overture-toward-gays-1.2797497

 

[Russell Street]

I must point out that the article uses the term immoral. Religion cares not about morals, it cares about holiness. To be correct, they'd have said unholy.

 

[OfficePants]

Whatever adds a few quid to the Vatican bank coffers.

 

[Russell Street]

Kesha, formerly known as Ke$ha, is suing her producer for drugging and groping her.

 

[Zé Ferreira]

Who wouldn't grope and drug dat?

 

[Grand Potentate]

A Muslim terrorized some Canadians today

 

[OfficePants]

A Muslim terrorized some Canadians today

Just substitute *canadians* with whatever ethnic group you wish, including their own.

There was a stoning vid on het-LiveLeak today I didn't have the heart to post. They're the same kind of sociopaths that are posted in the street fight thread, worse actually, because they probably accused an innocent and kind woman.

 

[Grand Potentate]

A teenager in Washington state shot a few other teenagers at school today, then killed himself.

 

[Betelgeuse]

I don't have words to describe this.

http://www.thedailybeast.com/articl...weeted-her-murder.html?via=FB_Page&source=TDB

 

[Grand Potentate]

Jesus christ that's sad.

 

[Betelgeuse]

Indeed. You don't want to mess up with the narcos.

 

[Russell Street]

Jose Conseco failed at cleaning a handgun safely but succeeded in blowing of his middle finger.

 

[OfficePants]

Jose Conseco failed at cleaning a handgun safely but succeeded in blowing of his middle finger.

Quintessential news you can lose.

 

[Russell Street]

Tom Magliozzi of NPR's Car Talk, the Tappet brother with the beard, died at 77.

 

[OfficePants]

Tom Magliozzi of NPR's Car Talk, the Tappet brother with the beard, died at 77.

More pussy for me...

That was a fun show, sad it won't continue.

 

[OfficePants]

Team R won the midterms. Things are guaranteed to change now.

 

[Russell Street]

U.S. Mint temporarily sold out of Silver Eagles amid huge demand
http://www.reuters.com/article/2014/11/05/usa-mint-silver-coins-idUSL1N0SV2RP20141105

 

[Pauly Chase]

Team R won the midterms. Things are guaranteed to change now.

Could change. TBH, though D and R are same wolves under different sheep skin, I prefer R in congress. Maybe it would prevent BO from taking too many unilateral executive orders.