Use a fountain pen, you stupid pussy

Russell Street

Russell Street

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If you do not write with a fountain pen, it is because you are ignorant, uncultured, cheap or a total wussy. That is all.
 
Cursive was at it's most common during the heyday of quill and then fountain pens because they would blot when applied or removed from the medium. They are currently a pretentious, affected, inconvenient and outmoded tool propagated by groups and individuals that believe in steam-powered underwear and are psychologically removed from the demands, rigors and expectations of the modern world... and they all dress like these fucking goofballs.

Costumes-1.jpg
 
I wasn't going to make this about the superiority of fountain pen users, but there is that too.

Blot? That's the pemature ejaculation of a clumsy writer. The shoddy workman blames his tool.
 
I am old enough to remember when we had inkwells in our desks at school and pens that you dipped in ink. I'm sorry--and maybe it's my inner philistine--but fountain pens, like DE safety razors, are things I have no desire to go back to. Sometimes "progress" is indeed for the better.
 
Jan Libourel said:
Sometimes "progress" is indeed for the better.
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Meh. I like the sarcastic quotation marks. Double edge safety razors and fountain pens are modern ideals that have not been improved upon, only succeeded by inferior gimmicks.

All the steampunk chicks are bonable by degree, although that blond one is at the end of the line.
 
III said:
I would bone the steampunk in the middle.
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You usually bone in the middle, thanks for the attempted insight.

As far as fountain pens go, I used one for a while and would constantly get ink all over my hands. It was the pen's fault.
 
You don't hold the nib! That's like saying you dislike cigarettes because you burn your fingers.
Also, the ink is water based and washes off with something called soap and water.
 
Rev. Lovejoy - - - Lovejob. You bitches can thank me for that one with your hands.
 
Russell Street said:
Meh. I like the sarcastic quotation marks. Double edge safety razors and fountain pens are modern ideals that have not been improved upon, only succeeded by inferior gimmicks.
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Well, I used nothing but a DE safety razor from the time I started shaving back in 1954 until I discovered more modern alternatives in the summer of 1982. I have never had the slightest desire to go back. I don't know when I last used a fountain pen, but I feel the same way about those devices. Thus, I can claim to speak from experience.
 
Jan Libourel said:
Well, I used nothing but a DE safety razor from the time I started shaving back in 1954 until I discovered more modern alternatives in the summer of 1982. I have never had the slightest desire to go back. I don't know when I last used a fountain pen, but I feel the same way about those devices. Thus, I can claim to speak from experience.
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Oh... FUCK!!! This guy just shook his dick in your face, Russell Street!! How can you call yourself 'street' when someone shakes their dick in your face like that? I wouldn't let that happen on my street but, then and again, I don't use a fountain pen so I don't have a fucking care in the world.
 
Ray La Hood ain't from the hood.

The sad scrawny lines of bland colored oily ink left by pushing on a ballpoint are a punishment in themselves. That anyone would prefer this is similar to an adult choosing Mountain Dew over champagne.
 
Russell Street said:
Ray La Hood ain't from the hood.

The sad scrawny lines of bland colored oily ink left by pushing on a ballpoint are a punishment in themselves. That anyone would prefer this is similar to an adult choosing Mountain Dew over champagne.
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None of this applies to me. Basically nothing applies to me.
 
If I could write my posts with fountain pen, I would. In fact, I might start authoring my poasts and scanning them in, or just mailing them to the Powers That Be for transcription
 
I was required to use a fountain pen from age 7 to about 14 at school. Was not sad to see the back of them: I now use biros that charities send in the post, or that I have stolen from hotels. They give them out free in my bank but taking those just seems cheap somehow.

DE safety razors, on the other hand, are fantastic. I switched to them a couple of years ago and not only do I get a better shave, my skin has also felt a lot better.
 
hossoso said:
I don't know about this shit at all.
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As I said, ignorant. It's the first in the list.
MFDoom said:
In fact, I might start authoring my poasts and scanning them in, or just mailing them to the Powers That Be for transcription
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I kid you not, there is a thread over on Badger & Blade's Pen section in which every post is handwritten. Not being a member, I only see thumbnails.
ETF said:
I was required to use a fountain pen from age 7 to about 14 at school. Was not sad to see the back of them
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Germany? Gel and roller ball are tolerable, but going from a fountain pen to a crummy fine point oil-based ball point should be torture. You need to push the bitches into the paper to get them to lay a scrawny scratchy line of ink (with that stupid void in the middle from where the ball was). BTW the Reform 1745, the old German school pen, is a very nice nib and mine has not spilled a drop.
 
Russell Street said:
Germany? Gel and roller ball are tolerable, but going from a fountain pen to a crummy fine point oil-based ball point should be torture. You need to push the bitches into the paper to get them to lay a scrawny scratchy line of ink (with that stupid void in the middle from where the ball was). BTW the Reform 1745, the old German school pen, is a very nice nib and mine has not spilled a drop.
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No, England. I think we were allowed to pick our own; I, like most, had a Parker. I think the downfall was having to write lengthy essays and do exams - it was just quicker writing with a roller ball.
 
Behold, writing with boldness, variation, character. And that's on crummy legal paper. How weak would a picture of Bic stick writing be?
 
So Sly just stamps the back of his checks?
As fugly and garish as that pen is, it does raise the fact that if you are presented with a Faustian contract and Beelzebub presents you with a ball point, you would immediately doubt that this was a man of wealth and taste and immediately recognize him as the lord of the flies.
 
I wasn't the OP, bro. But you make an excellent point.

In any event my soul is the equivalent of an banana peel, so they can have the empty shell. I devoured the 'banana' long ago.
 
Hmmm. Unintended consequences of my handle. I'll just take the phone. I can get $200 in Russia for it. You can have the American piss beer as a finders fee.

By the way, one of the benefits of selling your soul is you can sell it to lots of people and nobody will be the wiser. You can totally make hundreds.
 
The Devil makes you sign in your own blood with a rusty ten-penny nail impaled through your palm. Everyone knows this.
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Water-based ink, continuous flow, solid metal point. Sounds like a fountain pen to me. I see no rolling ball anywhere. I pick on the ballpoint, but pencils and crayons are not going to cut it either.

Russell Street said:
I kid you not, there is a thread over on Badger & Blade's Pen section in which every post is handwritten. Not being a member, I only see thumbnails.
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Lest anyone think I make this stuff up -
http://badgerandblade.com/vb/showthread.php/339515-The-Handwritten-Thread
 
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1. Good point. You can still have it.

2. Fuck that. As long as monopoly money gets me a new pair of custom Trickers, I'm good. Mephistopheles can suck my dick.
 
Russell Street said:
Water-based ink, continuous flow, solid metal point. Sounds like a fountain pen to me. I see no rolling ball anywhere. I pick on the ballpoint, but pencils and crayons are not going to cut it either.





Lest anyone think I make this stuff up -

http://badgerandblade.com/vb/showthread.php/339515-The-Handwritten-Thread
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fountain pen network posts handwritten ink reviews...which are helpful but some are thorough and detailed to a degree that makes you wonder just how many cats they have.
 
Harveybirdman said:
I meant OP as in OfficePants not OP as in Original Poster.

And don't sell yourself short. Your soul may be dried and crusty and empty but every soul has value to Beelzebub. I'll send him along shortly to offer you a case of warm Michelob and a slightly used IPhone 3GS for it.
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I'm just want to say I really liked my iPhone 3GS, and kinda miss it.


Harveybirdman said:
Seriously if you uneducated peasants had read Dante's Inferno you'd be laughing your ass off the last page.

Dummies.
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Well ideally one should read the whole Commedia, not just Inferno. :lulz-78:
 
MFDoom said:
fountain pen network posts handwritten ink reviews...which are helpful but some are thorough and detailed to a degree that makes you wonder just how many cats they have.
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FPN is another place I refuse to join, but they do seem to be very obsessive. Wanting to know if a few raindrops or a coffee spill will render your grocery list unreadable is one thing, but why are they so concerned about legibility after bleach attack or being left in direct sunlight all month.
 
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tear_gas_fountain_pen.jpg



Well, she looks just straight fucking tickled by her new tear-gas dispensing fountain pen. I want to experience that sort of contented satisfaction right now. I bet all her friends spent their allowances on pin-wheels and hard candies, but not this little lady. She went the cleverly disguised weapon route.

Bravo.

.
 
See, do you you get to do crazy ink mixing and have fruity smelling ink with lesser forms of wrinting instruments? I think not!
 
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