Sorry, the way the pics posted make it hard to follow. Bottom line, some school kid tweets about wanting school cancelled because of a little bit of snow. The school board responds with a snarky tweet saying suck it up and owns the kid. Another tries and is shot down again.
School board not being politically correct is awesome
Hound Bandits Half Marathon in Alabama The canine ran the entire 13.1-mile distance, much to the surprise of her owner.
ByMegan Hetzel FRIDAY, JANUARY 22, 2016, 3:32 PM
Ludivine pads along beside participants at the first half marathon to be held in Elkmont, Alabama.
PHOTOGRAPH BY WERUNHUNTSVILLE/GREGG GELMIS
Early Saturday morning, Ludivine, a 2½-year-old hound dog, was let out of the house in Elkmont, Alabama, to do her business. Prone to roaming around town at will, Ludivine snuck out of the backyard and made her way to the starting area of the inaugural Trackless Train Trek Half Marathon about a quarter mile away.
Ludivine proceeded to mingle with the runners, run the entire 13.1-mile course, cross the finish line in an unofficial 1:32:56, and have a medal draped over her floppy brown ears—all without her owner, April Hamlin, realizing she had wandered off in the first place. The incident was first reported in Canadian Running Magazine.
“All I did was open the door, and she ran the race on her own accord,” Hamlin, 43, told Runner’s World, saying she received texts with photos of Ludivine from friends who were volunteering at the finish. “My first reaction was that I was embarrassed and worried that she had possibly gotten in the way of the other runners.”
Ludivine took off with runners from the start of the race downtown.
PHOTOGRAPH BY WERUNHUNTSVILLE/GREGG GELMIS
Hamlin said Ludivine has a penchant for solo strolls through downtown or the woods nearby—to the point where everyone in Elkmont knows who she is—so the guidance counselor at Elkmont High School wasn’t surprised her pup had left her pen again.
The fact that she ran 13.1 miles did take her aback, however. “She’s laid back and friendly, so I can’t believe she ran the whole half marathon because she’s actually really lazy,” said Hamlin, who added that she isn’t a runner herself.
Tim Horvath, 49, ran most of the race with the pup.
“I saw her for the first time in the parking lot before the race,” said Horvath, a resident of Huntsville, Alabama. “She came bouncing up, and I petted her on the head. I saw her collar, so I just figured she was somebody’s dog. Elkmont is a small town where everyone knows everybody, so it didn’t strike me as unusual.”
Once the starting gun fired, Ludivine took off with the leaders, including Jim Clemens, 48, who eventually placed fourth overall in 1:23:15.
“Every time I thought she had dropped off to go back home, I would hear her coming back up to me, and she would race past me up to the two leaders,” Clemens said. “She would run off to romp through streams and into yards to sniff around for a while.”
Tim Horvath ran most of the race alongside Ludivine.
PHOTOGRAPH BY WERUNHUNTSVILLE/GREGG GELMIS
When Ludivine stopped to investigate a dead rabbit around the two-mile mark, Horvath caught back up with her. For the rest of the race, Ludivine stayed within 50 meters of Horvath, hopping on and off the course.
“One time she went over and met another dog next to the course,” Horvath said. “Later on, she went into a field with some mules and cows. Then she’d come back and run around our legs. I wondered if she was going to get tired or go back to wherever her home was.”
But Ludivine kept running despite her distractions and eventually finished just behind Horvath who ran 1:32 for sixth place. Once Ludivine crossed the line, she slowed to a walk. Volunteers, apparently in awe of the spectacle, put a medal around her neck and started taking photos, Horvath said.
Ludivine makes her final strides to the finish line; the pup poses with her finisher's medal.
PHOTOGRAPH COURTESY OF JAKE ARMSTRONG/APRIL HAMLIN
Hamlin said she is thrilled by the attention Ludivine’s race banditing has brought to the race.
“It’s the first half marathon in Elkmont, and the people who started it are parents of the kids who run cross country,” Hamlin said. “They wanted to try and fundraise because our school system doesn’t have a ton of money for cross country. Because of this dog, they are getting so much publicity, and I think that’s the best part.”
I used to frequent a cafe /restaurant years ago that had a relief/fresco on the wall made out of using old firescreens as a mould and then all run together along about 10 metres. Looks great. I always wanted to do it myself abut never got around to it
Introducing ‘The President Erdogan Offensive Poetry Competition’ – £1000 prize to be won
18 April 2016
Nobody should be surprised that Turkey’s President Recep Tayyip Erdogan has instituted effective blasphemy laws to defend himself from criticism in Turkey. But many of us had assumed that these lèse-majesté laws would not yet be put in place inside Europe. At least not until David Cameron succeeds in his long-held ambitionto bring Turkey fully into the EU. Yet here we are. Erdogan’s rule now already extends to Europe.
At the end of last month, during a late-night comedy programme, a young German comedian called Jan Böhmermann included a poem that was rude about Erdogan. Incidentally the point of Mr Böhmermann’s skit was to highlight the obscenity of Turkey already trying to censor satire in Germany.
What happened next happened in swift order. First of all the Turks complained to their German counterparts. Within a few days the programme had been pulled. A few more days and it was whitewashed out of existence altogether. In the meantime Mr Böhmermann himself was forced to go under police protection. The worst blow then came late last week when Chancellor Merkel allowed the prosecution of Mr Böhmermann to go ahead in Germany. Strangely enough, Chancellor Merkel is currently pretending that the trial of a German comedian in Germany for insulting a foreign despot is a liberal act. Don’t we all understand, she asks, that the courts will decide? Well no – the very possibility of putting someone on trial for being rude about Erdogan is as illiberal or rather anti-liberal as these things come. It will be hardly more of a relief if he is found ‘not guilty’ than if he is found ‘guilty’. The fact such a trial could even be contemplated demonstrates that Germany is becoming little more than a satrapy of Erdogan’s.
Well I’m a free-born British man, and we don’t live under the blasphemy laws of such despots. So in honour of this fact I have spent the weekend writing rude limericks about Mr Erdogan. And I would hereby like to invite all readers to join me in a grand Erdogan limerick competition. That isn’t to say that entries which come in the form of Iambic pentameters, or heroic couplets will be completely discounted. I think a work in the Homeric mode, for example, about the smallness of Erdogan’s manhood could (if suitably disgusting) stand some chance of winning. But I recommend limericks because almost everything insulting that is worth saying can usually be included within the five lines of that beautiful and delicate form.
I have not been able to find a sponsor for the competition. So there aren’t any prizes – except perhaps for our continuing freedom. If there is anyone out there who would seriously prefer a box of Ferrero Rocher, Turkish Delight or whatever then I don’t want them to enter this competition anyway.
I would also like to stress that the aim of the competition is to be as filthy and insulting as possible about Recep Erdogan. Rhymes with some political point might be considered, but will inevitably take second-place to works which mull (for example) solely on President Erdogan’s reputed fondness for goats or his notorious untrustworthiness in the vicinity of any public zoo.
The limerick that follows is my best shot so far. But I am happy to report that there are many available rhymes and sexual positions which are still in my jotting pad and remain unused. I should like to reiterate that limericks will be excluded from consideration from the top prize if they are (a) not obscene or (b) non-defamatory. I do not want to have to, Vizier-like, proclaim my own poem the winner. Anyhow, here’s mine:
Recep Erdogan is the Turk’ll
Never tire of rim-jobs from his circle
Yet his chief-est delight
(Now Khilafa’s in sight)
Are the felchings he gets from Frau Merkel
Now purists will notice that I have committed two potential solecisms here. The first is to rhyme ‘Turk’ll’ with ‘circle’. It works when read out loud, but I agree that a purer version would require one to spell out ‘Turk who’ll’. Yet that, I think, would not quite catch the rhyme. Keen-eyed readers will also notice that I have had to use the Arabic ‘Khilafa’ over the more usual (in English) ‘Caliphate’. Personally I think the former works better and adds a touch of exoticism to the work, but there will doubtless be critics who will claim that this use of a foreign word or archaism over its demotic equivalent is done purely in order the keep the fourth line metrical. I recognise this criticism and simply throw myself at the feet of metrical purists everywhere.
Anyway – see if you can do any better. Please submit all entries to email@example.com, under the heading ‘The President Erdogan Offensive Poetry Competition’. The winning poem will be announced by 23 June. Because we may not be able to announce it after that point.
Update: A generous reader, who shares the Spectator’s belief in the freedom of speech, is offering a £1000 prize for the best limerick. We’ve had some great entries so far, please keep them coming.