Ridiculous Stories In The News

OfficePants

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Look no further for the definition of an idiot.

Massachusetts state Rep. Michelle DuBois is tipping off illegal immigrants to imminent ICE raids.

 

OfficePants

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Student's grade goes down for using 'mankind'


man·kind
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noun: mankind
1
.
human beings considered collectively; the human race.
 

Rambo

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https://kotaku.com/starbucks-workers-unprepared-for-unicorn-frappuccino-ar-1794496679

comments are worth a read. they range from "this is what capitalism is all about" and others saying "this is why retail sucks."

Starbucks Workers Unprepared For Unicorn Frappuccino Armageddon


Quote via Jozsma on Reddit, who adds “I love my job. Just not frappuccinos.”

Yesterday Starbucks employees across the country were ravaged by stampeding hordes eager to get their mouths on the new Unicorn Frappuccino. Today the Starbucks Reddit is filled with their tales of courage and survival.


I got to try out the strange, limited-edition sour mango concoction prior to yesterday’s wide release courtesy of my wife, who has somehow managed to work for Starbucks for more than a decade without stabbing anyone in the neck when they ask for a large half-caf soy latte with extra foam (which might not be a real thing.) Halfway through her shift yesterday she called home to mumble something it about being the “worst day ever.” She also said something about “fucking unicorns.” Pretty sure she was referring to the drink and not the act.

Her store closes at 8PM and she’s usually home by 8:45. Last night she stumbled in at 10PM with slightly purple fingers and a glassy look in her eye. It was the Unicorn Frappuccino onslaught that done it. At around closing time a woman walked up to the counter and ordered three of the drinks. The customer behind her ordered one. Then the woman who had ordered three came back to order four more.


Eight drinks at closing time? That’s insanity! Or so I thought, until I took a trip through the Starbucks Reddit this morning. Here’s a store in San Francisco that received an order for 100 of the damn things.

Image via keakin on Reddit.
Several comments sprinkled like unicorn dandruff across the Reddit talk about customers ordering the novelty drink in large numbers. Here are some quotes from various threads in the subreddit.

  • In Houston - We had another store call us if we had extra pink powder since they were running low and apparently they had 42 UNICORN FRAP ORDER! I do not know what size they were... but FORTY FUCKING TWO!!
  • We made 417 unicorn frappuccinos today.
  • For fucks sake. I’ve been working a never ending line up since 12. And it’s already 5:30. AND THERES ONLY FUCKING TWO OF US WORKING.
  • By the time I’d left (at 6.30), we’d sold 400 for the day. The prep wasn’t done. The floors weren’t done. We hadn’t even started on pre-closing tasks. I couldn’t even say the name of the fucking drink without feeling so embarrassed?
  • We just had a college class of 20 people come into cafe and each order one, most of them with modifications so we couldn’t even use the same blender. PLUS every single car in DT ordering at LEAST 2 unicorn frapps. All this with a whole 4 people working and breaks to run
  • I was off at 7, we sold 400 and it just kept going. And we had a dept count. And a delivery. ... I never though I’d have a near break down while covered in pink dust.
Several members of the Reddit reported running out of the ingredients used to make the Unicorn Frappuccino. The drink uses mango syrup, which isn’t a huge mover when not dyed pinkish purple via powder. The blue sour stuff is a combination of white mocha syrup, simple syrup and a special packet of sour powder. Not anticipating such a huge rush, some stores sold out of the drinks, while others got creative.

  • We ended up selling just under 500 by 7pm when we ran out of the pink and blue powder. By 5:30pm we had already run out of Mango and were subbing raspberry. I can’t even count the amount of disappointed customers who tried to order it after 7pm.
  • We hit more than 300 at my store and ran out of ingredients twice...
  • How much of the powder did everyone get? I’m at a Krobucks and we got 2 bags of pink powder and 8 bags of blue powder. We already went through 1 bag of the pink powder and 3 bags of the blue powder. I’m pretty sure we’re not gonna make it till Sunday.
  • I’ve asked to be on DT tomorrow just so I can tell people we don’t have it. Telling people no is my favorite part of this job.
  • I could forgive the complicated beverage build and excessive amount of ingredients. I could even forgive the fact that our store got totally slammed and we had no extra coverage for the event. What I absolutely cannot wrap my head around is the piddly amount of product that everyone was sent. Why the FUCK would they advertise a five day promotion if they were only going to send enough product for MAYBE one day?!?!?!
  • We ran out of unicorn ingredients and my SM went to the store to buy replacements. Now we are making imitation unicorn frappuccinos with non Starbucks ingredients. I know this is not ok, but I don’t know how to proceed. My SM is not listening to anyone about it.
Other subjects discussed on the Reddit today include stations coated with a fine pink dust, customers adding horrible ingredients to an already horrible drink, and stores woefully understaffed for such a popular promotion, like my wife’s store, which had only two people on shift last night.


Many Starbucks Redditors expressed their anger/frustration/amusement over the situation with the time-honored internet tradition of image posts.

When your coworker orders 16 Unicorn bullshits for her second job.

When all you see and hear is UNICORN

Took this after leaving work today.

when your store sells 35 unicorn frappuccinos in a half hour :)

But the best use of images to comment on the Unicorn Frappuccino goes to the mods of /r/Starbucks, who helpfully modified the header and theme of the site in honor of the special event.

So if you run into anyone who’s worked at a Starbucks in the States over the past couple of days, be sure to give them a nice big hug and whisper “venti Unicorn Frappuccino” softly in their ear. The hug is so they can’t claw or stab you.
 
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fxh

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Whatever your style - long black, latte, espresso or flat white - Australians love a good brew.

In most cities around the world you'd be hard pressed not to find a Starbucks on every corner - but on our turf they just haven't delivered. Starbucks have reportedly accumulated losses of at least $143 million since they opened here 14 years ago.

Having just sold their remaining outlets here to the massive multinational that runs 7-Eleven Starbucks will get one last shot at trying to become the most successful coffee chain in Australia

The coffee giant still has stores in 63 countries leaving very few nations Frappuccino free. There are even more than 11,500 stores across the US alone.And they're rapidly growing in Canada (1396 stores) and China (1219 stores).

But struggling to survive in Australia - Starbucks have closed around 60 shops leaving its current stable of just 22.

And if you ask any caffeine loving Australian they'll tell you that we make some of the best coffee in the world.

There's at least 6500 independent cafes across Australia generating about $4 billion annually mainly from coffee sales.

And on average Australians drink around 3- 4 cups a day. Will Young is the Managing Director of Campos Coffee, one of the most successful roasters in Australia. Mr Young says Australians just won't settle for your average blend.

"Many people see Australians as coffee snobs and really we are," says Mr Young. "We're spoiled rotten here for the great coffee all the time." "The specialty coffee industry in Australia has raised the bar so high... that Starbucks coming in sets a low level... where perhaps the baristas aren't so professional and are not as dedicated to their craft." "It's going to be tough for them
 

fxh

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Yes - the only customers in Starbucks in Melbourne are 20 year old Chinese girls in Hello Kitty clothes on student visas.
 

Fwiffo

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In the 72 storey office tower down the street from me there are 3 Starbucks in one building.
 

Lord Buckley

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Yes - the only customers in Starbucks in Melbourne are 20 year old Chinese girls in Hello Kitty clothes on student visas.
The Starbucks in Shanghai serve decent teas. I wouldn't touch them over here. Awful.

I sometimes go on a Saturday morning to a coffee shop here in Delft that has great Ethiopian coffee. I'm quite a fan. The Nespresso Ethiopian coffee is good too, as well as their Brazilian capsule which from the taste is authentic.
 

Lord Buckley

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It certainly beats Brazil in whatever metric you look at it at, perhaps excluding Bossa Nova, although that is debatable when you include Stan Getz, et al.
 

Scherensammler

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Looks like Canada is following the USA:

http://www.cbc.ca/beta/news/politics/transgender-prison-policy-trudeau-1.4075500

After nearly two decades of taunts, threats and physical abuse behind bars, Fallon Aubee hopes to become Canada's first federal inmate to be placed in a prison based on gender identity rather than biological sex at birth.

Aubee, who's serving a life sentence at B.C.'s Mission Institution, has applied for a transfer to a women's penitentiary under a new policy prompted by Prime Minister Justin Trudeau earlier this year.

"It's an opportunity to make some history, I suppose, but it's more so other transgenders can have their needs met and that's my goal," Aubee told CBC News in a telephone interview. "I will be the first one in Canada who goes from a prison for men to a prison for women."

Fallon, whose birth name is Jean-Paul, was convicted of first degree murder in 2003 in a street-gang contract killing case.
 

Thruth

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Scherensammler

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Good for Fallon. She is a poster child for Justin and how we all need to respect gender fluidity.

She will help the other girls in prison with their appeals and complaints with prison administration.

I am sure she will be the only contract killer in the women's prison too and will be able to pass on some tips.
Could be a successful TV show, including some saucy scenes in the shower room. Unless, of course, the prison is forced to build one (or more) for transgenders.

Just follow your dream:


I feel sorry for the poor guy who has to lift a 6+ foot ballerina.
 

OfficePants

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Lord Buckley

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Could be a successful TV show, including some saucy scenes in the shower room. Unless, of course, the prison is forced to build one (or more) for transgenders.

Just follow your dream:


I feel sorry for the poor guy who has to lift a 6+ foot ballerina.
It's the parents and racing car sponsors I feel sorry for.
 

Fwiffo

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Restaurant guilty of brutal dismemberment of lobsters

"It would also set legal parameters for the killing of live lobsters and other seafood. With land animals, slaughter is closely regulated and conducted in federally inspected abattoirs. The killing of live seafood, meanwhile, is governed in large part by culinary tradition. For most chefs and home cooks in North America, the conventional method of killing lobsters is to throw them whole into boiling water, pierce the brain with something sharp or slice them in half quickly. But according to Ms. Labchuk, the most humane way of killing a lobster is to use an electric stunner."

Electric stunner? I'm going to keep something that emits electricity next to something drenched in water?

First of all, I ate at this restaurant. I didn't see any lobster here close to 13 lbs. Maybe 1 1/2 lbs. Their specialty is offering champagne by the glass.

Second of all, what's a humane way of killing an animal before you eat it? Obviously none of these animal rights people have gone fishing. Things have to die for your to consume it so you can survive. Or do us all a favour and stop consuming things and die off if you're so concerned.
 

Scherensammler

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And just think about what humans do to plants so vegans and vegetarians can have a meal.
For example bananas. They grow up in plastic bags, get separated from the rest of their family at a very young age, get split up even further into groups of five only to be shipped thousands of kilometres into foreign countries where they have their skin removed before they are eaten.
 

Fwiffo

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For example bananas. They grow up in plastic bags, get separated from the rest of their family at a very young age...
A family? Bananas have families? It's a fruit. What's next? I must psycho analyze my cow and convince it to accept slaughter before I have it ground up for kebabs?
 

Thruth

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https://www.google.ca/amp/s/www.thestar.com/amp/news/gta/2017/05/22/university-student-union-takes-a-walk-on-the-controversial-side-over-lou-reed-song.html

Know-it-all Snowflakes SJW's at the University of Guelph get it wrong big time on Lou Reed & Walk on the Wild Side. Guess that cannot do top top desktop research to see that Reed liked Man-Sex, Trans-Sex and basically introduced trans to popular musical culture:

The student union at the University of Guelph has gained international attention — much of it negative — for criticizing the classic rock song “Walk on the Wild Side” as “transphobic.”

The university’s Central Student Association apologized via social media for playing Lou Reed’s 1972 hit at a campus event.

“It’s come to our attention that the playlist we had . . . on Thursday contained a song with transphobic lyrics,” the student association said in a May 12 Facebook post that has since been deleted.

“We now know the lyrics to this song are hurtful to our friends in the trans community and we’d like to unreservedly apologize for this error in judgement (sic).”

The student association said the person who selected the song for the playlist did not “know or understand” the lyrics, which include the lines, “Holly came from Miami F.L.A. . . . Plucked her eyebrows on the way, shaved her legs and then he was a she. She said, ‘Hey babe, take a walk on the wild side.’”

Article Continued Below

In the days since the statement was posted, news outlets around the world have picked up the story. Friends, colleagues and biographers of Reed have come to the late singer-songwriter’s defence.

“The song was a love song to all the people he knew and to New York City by a man who supported the community and the city his whole life,” said Reed’s former producer Hal Willner in an interview with the Guardian.

Howard Sounes, author of Notes from the Velvet Underground: The Life of Lou Reed, told the Star that Reed “cannot fairly be accused” of being transphobic.

“Lou Reed was a difficult and sometimes unpleasant person, but transphobic he was not,” Sounes said. “Reed was a bisexual who had close friendships, and conducted love affairs with, (transgender) men.”

In the mid-1970s, Reed was in what was essentially a marriage with a transgender person who went by both Ricky and Rachel, Sounes added.

“Lou loved Ricky/ Rachel, and was very public about their relationship at a time when such things were considered extremely outré . . . He was in love with transgender people. He found them exciting — sexually and intellectually — and he celebrated them in his work.”

On “Overheard at Guelph,” a popular Facebook group for students and alumni of the university, reaction to the student association’s statement was mixed.

“(They) literally found a pro-trans song to be transphobic because it implied being trans is uncommon/unusual. Look at when the song was written for a little perspective,” wrote one user.

“If the biggest controversy is that the (student association) apologized for a song being transphobic and then it turned out it wasn’t — that's basically fine,” wrote another. “Good on them for trying to be accountable, even if they got it wrong.”

The University of Guelph student association did not immediately respond to the Star’s request for comment on Monday.

Reed, who died in 2013 at age 71, rose to fame in the 1960s as a leading member of the Velvet Underground, one-time house band at Andy Warhol’s studio.

After leaving the group, Reed wrote “Walk on the Wild Side” inspired largely by Holly Woodlawn and Candy Darling, transgender women who starred in Warhol’s films.

“Holly is the guy from Miami who hitchhikes to New York, shaving his legs on the way,” Sounes said. “I interviewed Holly in New York for my book . . . shortly before (she) died recently. Holly loved ‘Walk on the Wild Side.’”

In a 2016 article about Reed for New York magazine’s entertainment blog Vulture, music critic Bill Wyman said much of Reed’s work centred on “the experience of the unwanted and the despised. Some of the words we have today — bullied, gay, trans — didn’t really exist as such back then.”

In his piece, Wyman singled out Reed’s compositions “Sister Ray” and “Sweet Jane” as examples of bringing transgender stories to mainstream music.

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viaattovannucci

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Are you trying to claim that it is ridiculous for people to have dietary restrictions? Are you OK with corporations (or, for that matter, mom-and-pop stores) putting out false advertising about their product to trick their customers and make a quick buck? Or are you just being ridiculous and bigoted yourself because you somehow consider it ridiculous that Jews and Muslims in the US dare to follow their own religious guidelines when it comes to ritual slaughter and meat preparation? Since when does any of that have anything to do with terrorism?
 
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OfficePants

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Are you trying to claim that it is ridiculous for people to have dietary restrictions? Are you OK with corporations (or, for that matter, mom-and-pop stores) putting out false advertising about their product to trick their customers and make a quick buck? Or are you just being ridiculous and bigoted yourself because you somehow consider it ridiculous that Jews and Muslims in the US dare to follow their own religious guidelines when it comes to ritual slaughter and meat preparation? Since when does any of that have anything to do with terrorism?
You should lighten up. I was being ironic. Of all the muslim hate on the west, they sure assimilated to our lawsuit culture quickly. I guess a fast buck doesn't violate sharia.
 
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