The Next Election, Political News, and Other Forms of Comedy (US, UK, & Intl)

[Fwiffo]

Ron DeSantis’ Hamptons fundraiser flops — while RFK Jr., Trump rake it in

Ron DeSantis scrapped two Hamptons fund-raisers last weekend because of a lack of interest — while rival Donald Trump and upstart candidate Robert Kennedy Jr. raked in massive piles of cash, …

nypost.com

“George Santos could’ve pulled off a better fundraising swing in the Hamptons than Ron DeSantis did this past weekend.”

Low blow.

 

[Fwiffo]

Beer, barbecue and a bus: Inside Ron DeSantis' awkward comeback effort

The Florida governor has stuck to his old talking points, and the focus on retail politics has been less than smooth.

www.nbcnews.com

"Originally, organizers had made the event free to members of the homebuilders’ association and charged $50 per ticket for nonmembers. But in an effort to pack the room, the association dropped the price to $1 for nonmembers — a nominal fee designed to prevent tickets from being reserved by malicious actors."

Is the beer free at $1? Is it Bud Light?

"Later that evening, in Osceola, an 82-year-old farmer told DeSantis that he tends fewer acres since his wife died of cancer five years ago, and asked about the candidate’s thoughts on ethanol, a corn-based renewable fuel used in cars. DeSantis passed up an opportunity to offer sympathy, launching into a stump-speech promise to 'turn back this rush to electric vehicles.' Agreeing with DeSantis’ view on electric vehicles, the farmer said he couldn’t afford to transition his tractors and other equipment. In that case, it seemed, the voter found a way to connect with DeSantis rather than the other way around."

The EQ rating for Mr. DeSantis is..

 

[Fwiffo]

Ron DeSantis agrees to debate Gavin Newsom

Newsom, the Democratic governor of California, recently challenged DeSantis, the governor of Florida and GOP presidential candidate, to a "Red v. Blue debate."

www.nbcnews.com

There is laying off your campaign staff because you are running out of money and there is this.... What is this the point of this? I am ready to be President so I will spar with any Democrat?

 

[Dropbear]

Ron DeSantis agrees to debate Gavin Newsom

Newsom, the Democratic governor of California, recently challenged DeSantis, the governor of Florida and GOP presidential candidate, to a "Red v. Blue debate."

www.nbcnews.com

There is laying off your campaign staff because you are running out of money and there is this.... What is this the point of this? I am ready to be President so I will spar with any Democrat?

Vying for the biggest Participation Trophy?

 

[Fwiffo]

‘There’s the traitor!’: Pro-Trump protesters gather outside Pence town hall

The former vice president's role on Jan. 6, when some rioters chanted “Hang Mike Pence,” has been thrust back into the spotlight following the election charges against Trump.

www.nbcnews.com

I am sure at some point Pence thought this would be an inflection point for his campaign…for the better.

 

[Fwiffo]

Ron DeSantis replaces his campaign manager as he reboots his presidential bid

The move comes weeks before the first GOP debate, which advisers say is key to getting the Florida governor's campaign back on track.

www.nbcnews.com

I thought she was a dead woman walking a few weeks ago.

 

[Fwiffo]

Trump mocks Chris Christie's weight: 'Don't call him a fat pig'

The former president made fun of the former New Jersey governor and 2024 Republican nomination rival during a speech in New Hampshire.

www.nbcnews.com

Let the GOP debates commence. Quality debates.

 

[Fwiffo]

Did US ask for Imran Khan’s removal as Pakistan PM after he visited Russia?

Intercept cites alleged ‘cypher’ to suggest US official told a Pakistani envoy ‘all will be forgiven’ if Khan is sacked.

www.aljazeera.com

Talk to any Pakistani and anything and everything about the government only happens because of the CIA...

 

[Fwiffo]

Hunter Biden could face trial, newly named US special counsel says

The latest developments are a sign that courtroom drama could play an outsized role in the 2024 presidential election.

www.reuters.com

For the love of God, are there no other capable people amongst the 332M citizens of the United States of America than one obese misogynist who has multiple indictments against him and countless civil suits against him, his corporation and the kids that run his business versus another guy who struggles to go up/down stairs, has random brain farts, and has an adulterer of a son who has been accused of raking it in from every fourth country around the world.

I was watching a round table of Gen Z Americans (who apparently are hitting 28 years old this year) and I have to feel pity for them. They can't see any sane or logical - much less inspiring - leadership amongst the two they will likely choose in 2024.

This in the face of a country and a planet that needs a solution to climate change (nee global warming), proper and effective use of new technologies (space, AI, automation etc.), an ageing demographic, and a strategic, thoughtful and visionary response to the challenges from the up & coming BRICS nations - beyond photo ops, punitive military strikes and bi-lateral trade deals to save my own western nation's hide for another year so I get re-elected.

 

[Fwiffo]

Javier Milei: Trump admirer leads race for Argentina presidency

Javier Milei gets the biggest number of votes in a primary considered a key indicator for the election.

www.bbc.com

"Speaking after the primary on Sunday he told his cheering supporters that 'we have managed to build this competitive alternative that will put an end to the parasitic, thieving, useless political caste'. The 52-year-old has said that if elected, he would abolish Argentina's central bank, replace the peso with the US dollar and privatise state-run firms which are making a loss.

In a policy that brings to mind Brazil's former far-right leader, Jair Bolsonaro, Mr Milei also proposes loosening gun controls. Mr Milei has also stated that he is opposed to abortion unless the mother's life is at risk and has included a promise 'to protect children's lives from conception' in his campaign programme.
He has attacked sex education in schools as a ploy to destroy the 'traditional family' and is a climate-change denier."

Looking back a decade ago you could say the US was at the forefront of 21st century political thinking.

 

[Fwiffo]

Behind Trump's huge support linger doubts on electability

Most Republicans plan to back Mr Trump if he wins the nomination, even if they want to move past him.

www.bbc.com

"Like many others I spoke to, Skyler Akins said he is not supporting Mr Trump to become the Republican candidate - but if wins the nomination, he will campaign for him."

"Allen English is president of the Atlanta Young Republicans....'If he were to get the nomination, I certainly would hope that he could win because he will be better than Joe Biden,' he said. 'But I will be very concerned in 2024 If Donald Trump is our nominee.'"

Average as of Aug. 16, 2023​

• Trump 53.7%
• DeSantis 14.7%
• Ramaswamy 7.0%
• Pence 5.4%
• Haley 3.7%
• Christie 2.7%
• Scott 2.2%
• Burgum 0.5%
• Hutchinson 0.4%
• Suarez 0.3%
• Hurd 0.1%

We hate him, but we want to win and we don't like Biden.

 

[Fwiffo]

Ron DeSantis security tab approached $10 million as he prepped presidential run

Cost to state taxpayers increased by 55% compared to the previous year.

www.nbcnews.com

"In total, the Florida Department of Law Enforcement last year spent $9.4 million on salaries for agents and transportation costs for the detail that protects DeSantis, his wife, Casey, and their three children, according to state records — a more than 55% increase in the cost of protecting him."

Trump blames left for legal costs

Trump’s Save America PAC shrank from over $100 million at the beginning of last year to $3.6 million after bankrolling legal fees for the former president and his allies.

www.politico.com

"Trump’s Save America PAC shrank from over $100 million at the beginning of last year to $3.6 million after bankrolling legal fees for the former president and his allies, according to filings first reported in The Washington Post. Filings also show that Save America and five other Trump committees have spent a total of over $40 million in legal fees since the start of 2021."

$10M...$40M...it's expensive to be a GOP primary frontrunner.

 

[Fwiffo]

US-Japan-SKorea summit a coup for Biden but will detente last?

The US hosts its first ever joint meeting with South Korea and Japan - neighbours with a tense relationship.

www.bbc.com

"In recent months, Mr Kishida and Mr Yoon have taken tentative steps to resolve their hostilities, and strengthen ties with Washington. This once-inconceivable alliance is driven by shared concerns - the biggest of which is China."

The enemy of my enemy is my friend?

 

[Fwiffo]

Trump has already recorded his debate-night counterprogramming interview with Tucker Carlson, sources say

Carlson has been in Europe since Saturday, a source close to the former Fox News host said.

www.nbcnews.com

So on the night of the first GOP debate I'm just going to kick back and watch myself on Twitter.

 

[Fwiffo]

What is BRICS, which countries want to join and why?

The BRICS group of major emerging economies - Brazil, Russia, India, China and South Africa - will hold its 15th heads of state and government summit in Johannesburg between Aug. 22 and Aug. 24.

www.reuters.com

Venezuela, Cuba: Waaahh US sanctions

Saudi Arabia, United Arab Emirates: Waaahh we need to launder our oil/blood money.

Iran: Waaahh we need money even ruble.

Argentina: Waaahh we need yet another currency reset and debt forgiveness

Democratic Republic of Congo: Waaahh I need money to pay for Wagner

 

[Fwiffo]

Vivek Ramaswamy suggests ‘the truth’ about 9/11 is still unknown

The Republican presidential candidate initially said he had been misquoted by The Atlantic, which later released an audio clip of his interview showing he was quoted accurately.

www.nbcnews.com

Brown people question Sept 11th too?

I thought this was settled in the lead up to the war in Afghanistan.

 

[Fwiffo]

Giuliani to surrender to authorities in Georgia election probe

The indictment alleges Giuliani was a key part of a criminal conspiracy, pressing election officials to act on voting fraud claims that he was repeatedly told were false.

www.nbcnews.com

"'I get photographed, isn’t that nice? A mugshot for the mayor who probably put the worst criminal of the 20th century in jail,' Giuliani complained to reporters when he left his apartment."

Oh he's pleading not guilty.

 

[belinmad]

Vivek Ramaswamy suggests ‘the truth’ about 9/11 is still unknown

The Republican presidential candidate initially said he had been misquoted by The Atlantic, which later released an audio clip of his interview showing he was quoted accurately.

www.nbcnews.com

Brown people question Sept 11th too?

I thought this was settled in the lead up to the war in Afghanistan.

Brown people?

 

[Fwiffo]

Yes. Indians.

Saudi Arabia, Iran to join BRICS as group admits six new members

Talks of expansion have dominated the three-day annual summit of major emerging economies in Johannesburg.

www.aljazeera.com

Argentina, Egypt, Ethiopia and the United Arab Emirates will join Saudi Arabia and Iran

....do they need a new acronym?

 

[belinmad]

Yes. Indians.

Saudi Arabia, Iran to join BRICS as group admits six new members

Talks of expansion have dominated the three-day annual summit of major emerging economies in Johannesburg.

www.aljazeera.com

Argentina, Egypt, Ethiopia and the United Arab Emirates will join Saudi Arabia and Iran

....do they need a new acronym?

What they do need is not being called brown.

 

[Fwiffo]

The 4th Georgia indictment factored in...

Ron DeSantis left the debate untouched — because no one bothered to attack him

The Florida governor wasn’t the target many expected he would be, reflecting shifting dynamics in the race against former President Donald Trump.

www.nbcnews.com

Continuing to self implode?

Vivek Ramaswamy embraces being the center of attention at a debate without Trump

No candidate launched more attacks nor was attacked more than Vivek Ramaswamy. His rivals think they exposed him. But he and allies see a clear victory.

www.nbcnews.com

So let's attack this guy instead...

 

[Fwiffo]

Jacksonville shooting: DeSantis booed at vigil for victims of racist attack

Hundreds gathered on Sunday to remember the three victims of a racist shooting in the Florida city.

www.bbc.com

The art of perfect timing as personified by Ron DenSantis.

 

[Fwiffo]

Vivek Ramaswamy says he would've certified the 2020 election results and that Pence missed an ‘opportunity for heroism'

The GOP presidential candidate said on “Meet the Press” that he would have quickly pushed through election law changes after the storming of the Capitol on Jan. 6, 2021.

www.nbcnews.com

“I want to build on the foundation that Trump laid, frankly, I will invite him as an adviser and a mentor,”

“I’ve enjoyed getting to know better Elon Musk recently, I expect him to be an interesting adviser of mine because he laid off 75% of the employees at Twitter,”

Advised by the twin pillars of the American 21st century...Trump and Musk.

 

[Fwiffo]

Japan urges China to halt harassment over Fukushima water release

Tokyo has complained of thousands of harassing phone calls that appear to originate in China, while Beijing says its diplomatic missions in Japan have been targeted as well.

www.nbcnews.com

The future of international relations - prank calls and stoning. Citizens - rise up and do your patriotic duty.

 

[Fwiffo]

Disengaging with China not credible, says James Cleverly

Speaking to the BBC, the foreign secretary defends China visit as MPs call UK approach "incoherent".

www.bbc.com

We need their money and we need to buy their electric vehicles and other goods.

 

[Fwiffo]

Marjorie Taylor Greene says Mitch McConnell is 'not fit for office' after he appeared to freeze up for the second time

McConnell appeared to freeze Wednesday during a gaggle with reporters in Kentucky, pausing for more than 30 seconds after he was asked whether he would run for re-election.

www.nbcnews.com

When Marjorie Taylor Greene says you're unfit for office....

 

[Fwiffo]

Biden says he’s disappointed that China's Xi won't attend G20 summit

The president will visit India from Sept. 7-10 for a summit of the Group of 20 nations, followed by a trip to Vietnam as his administration seeks to strengthen U.S. relations in Asia.

www.nbcnews.com

Snubbed.

 

[belinmad]

Breaking - 'Broke' Birmingham City Council issues plea for Government help

Birmingham City Council has issued a Section 114 notice - an admission that it can't manage its catastrophic financial crisis without help

www.birminghammail.co.uk

Maybe they should call Pimpy to solve it

 

[Fwiffo]

Ukraine war: Kim Jong Un 'to visit Putin for weapons talks'

North Korea's leader will discuss supplying weapons for Russia to use in Ukraine, US media report.

www.bbc.com

"However, a deal could end up being more transactional than strategic. For now, Russia needs weapons, and sanctioned-starved North Korea needs money and food. Pyongyang and Moscow have both previously denied that the North is supplying Russia with arms for use in its war in Ukraine."

I thought Prigozhin already bought some and used it in combat.

"'And while North Korea has stockpiles of weapons that Moscow needs, 'they're in very poor condition', he added."

....because they aren't maintained by the 1 million man army, because they're rubbish at manufacturing, because....?

 

[Grand Potentate]

Breaking - 'Broke' Birmingham City Council issues plea for Government help

Birmingham City Council has issued a Section 114 notice - an admission that it can't manage its catastrophic financial crisis without help

www.birminghammail.co.uk

Maybe they should call Pimpy to solve it

lol

 

[Fwiffo]

Capitol physician says "no evidence" McConnell has seizure disorder, stroke, Parkinson's

"There is no evidence that you have a seizure disorder or that you experienced a stroke, TIA or movement disorder such as Parkinson's disease," the attending physician of Congress said.

www.cbsnews.com

"Occasional lightheadedness is not uncommon in concussion recovery and can also be expected as a result of dehydration,"

And here I thought the diagnosis would have been - you're old and getting senile.

 

[Fwiffo]

India or Bharat? Invites fuel speculation that the country could change its name

A state-issued invite to a dinner reception for world leaders during the G20 summit in India referred to the “President of Bharat” — the Hindi or Sanskrit version of India.

www.nbcnews.com

First it was Turkiye....now it's Bharat. Do we call them Bharatis after?

 

[Fwiffo]

Vivek Ramaswamy’s campaign dials back candidate’s claim that he 'can’t travel to China'

The GOP presidential candidate had suggested he was barred from China after speaking out against its government. His campaign now says he was simply advised not to go.

www.nbcnews.com

“'I can’t travel to China,' Ramaswamy said, later adding, 'We’re in the same club.'

After the event, Williams tweeted: 'Vivek & I both are on the [Chinese Communist Party's] Blacklist, we are doing something right.'"

Notoriety is the key to becoming US president?

 

[Fwiffo]

Delhi G20: How India is asserting its global presence at G20 summit

Delhi is pulling out all the stops to dazzle world leaders as they prepare to gather this weekend.

www.bbc.com

"But there is another side to the beautification drive. Temporary cloth walls have been erected in front of many slums to hide them from view and, in some cases, residents have been relocated. Beggars have been evicted from the heart of the city - it's not clear where they have been moved to. But there is another side to the beautification drive. Temporary cloth walls have been erected in front of many slums to hide them from view and, in some cases, residents have been relocated. Beggars have been evicted from the heart of the city - it's not clear where they have been moved to."

Wait till you see what they do in China.

"Mr Jacob says this was most evident during the pandemic, when India helped countries in Africa, South Asia and even China, 'while the Western countries were only looking after themselves'."

Bullshit. It was every man for himself at that time - and it still is...do you want to lift your rice export ban? Or stop reselling repackaged 'Indian' petrol from Russia that you purchased at discounted lows?

 

[Fwiffo]

Sen. John Fetterman on Republicans trying to impeach Biden: 'Go ahead, do it. I dare you.'

The Pennsylvania Democrat taunted House Republicans who plan to launch an impeachment inquiry, calling it a losing strategy.

www.nbcnews.com

"'Your man has what, three or four indictments now?' Fetterman said. 'Trump has a mug shot, and he’s been impeached twice.' 'Sometimes you just gotta call their bulls---,' he said."

And what pray tell can a first term junior senator do? Cast a vote or abstain and let the government shut down said impeachment and everything else?

 

[Fwiffo]

Xi's no-show at the G20 is another sign of deepening divisions around the world

"So the G20, in my view, will be transformed from a premier forum for international economic policy coordination into a forum for two sides — the advanced countries represented by the G7 and the developing countries which the BRICS aspire to coordinate and represent.

"So, basically like a mini-UN, which is a very sad development."

It's okay. We'll just make decisions on behalf of those that aren't at the G20 G18 and then pat each other on the back at the next G8 G7 (and after a Trump 2024 win) G6 summit

 

[Fwiffo]

Nancy Pelosi: Democrat and ex-Speaker, 83, to seek re-election

The first female House Speaker will seek a 19th term, reigniting debate about the age of US leaders.

www.bbc.com

We want 2 more years! 2 more years! 2 more years!

 

[Fwiffo]

Vivek Ramaswamy says he'll deport children of undocumented immigrants born in the U.S.

Those children, however, are American citizens under the 14th Amendment.

www.nbcnews.com

The US is full. Especially after my own parents came here and had me.

 

[Fwiffo]

Biden gives Saudi Arabia’s MBS a hearty handshake after awkward fist bump

* * *

www.timesofisrael.com

MBS. Biden. Brokered by Modi.

Sept 11?
Khashoggi?

Forgotten. Now give me some cheap oil and prop up some sports and business franchises.

 

[Dropbear]

When politicians show up to random football games to garner support: