Things You Just Don't Get

I was going to say I brought home Portuguese custard tarts, a meringue and some apple/raspberry tarts from my Saturday market trip - from a real bakery.

I was going to make the chorizo stew but I will do it next weekend. My aunt popping up interrupted things.
 
My sister in law wants me to find someone and settle down.
 
Why do people crippled in scooters always drive like they want you to lose a limb or two as well? Is there a group discount if enough people buy these scooters?
 
What's a 7 star hotel? I thought it only went to 5 stars.
 
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A man rings the local government to fix a pothole in the road, but instead they plant a tree in the road.
Tree in road.jpg
 
Was at a home bar. Crowd of 8 came for karaoke night. 1 girl left at the bar starts a conversation with me. Brushes boyfriend off between songs for 3 or 4 times. Talks about Black Mirror. Social media. 'Young people'. Confesses she is 36. Really wants to connect. We quite obviously had a deeper conversation than she ever did with her boyfriend.
 
Fwiffo said:
https://www.msn.com/en-ca/entertain...unterparts/ss-AAxc8Ww?ocid=spartandhp#image=6

Daniel Craig is the same as Humphrey Bogart? That's a load of bollocks.
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Not enough whisky and woodbines for starters.

Fwiffo said:
Was at a home bar. Crowd of 8 came for karaoke night. 1 girl left at the bar starts a conversation with me. Brushes boyfriend off between songs for 3 or 4 times. Talks about Black Mirror. Social media. 'Young people'. Confesses she is 36. Really wants to connect. We quite obviously had a deeper conversation than she ever did with her boyfriend.
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36 is pretty young and your thirties are the last decade before you recognize that even your goodself is not immune to the ageing process and mortality.
 
Pimpernel Smith said:
36 is pretty young and your thirties are the last decade before you recognize that even your goodself is not immune to the ageing process and mortality.
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Is it? That's the age I'm afraid women will jump you to fulfill their maternity wishes. Honestly if the boyfriend wasn't around necking her every karaoke song I would have stayed to talk to her.
 
Why do Indian people keep asking me to "do the needful"? We're not in the 19th century Raj. It's a requisite or a requirement.

For people who want to throw the yoke off their imperial masters they sure cling on to some things for a long time.
 
Ripped jeans. I just saw this young woman realise getting off a bus that she put something in the back pocket that is ripped and it fell out. She ran back and thought it was on the bus seat but looks like it fell out a long time ago.
 
Fwiffo said:
Ripped jeans. I just saw this young woman realise getting off a bus that she put something in the back pocket that is ripped and it fell out. She ran back and thought it was on the bus seat but looks like it fell out a long time ago.
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Ripped jeans are an intriguing fashion enigma. They first came in with a Bananarama/Fun Boy Three look in 1983 and they've been a fashion affliction ever since. Somehow always in fashion and yet they should be stale and old hat by any standards of decency or taste.
 
Pimpernel Smith said:
Ripped jeans are an intriguing fashion enigma. They first came in with a Bananarama/Fun Boy Three look in 1983 and they've been a fashion affliction ever since. Somehow always in fashion and yet they should be stale and old hat by any standards of decency or taste.
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True. But just add to that the ongoing "success" of the leggings.
Around here the preferred outfit of women who should go nowhere near them, along with tank tops that are at least 2, maybe even 3 sizes too small.
 
People are getting colds now. It has been above 30 plus humidex for most of the past week with temperatures at least high 20s. Irresponsible air conditioning? Commercial and public spaces here have only just started turning them on and were barely coping.
 
Just getting into cold weather here. Places running out of flu vax. Getting good coverage with flu vax this year. It’s free for under 3 and over 65. Many workplaces provide free flu vax
 
fxh said:
Just getting into cold weather here. Places running out of flu vax. Getting good coverage with flu vax this year. It’s free for under 3 and over 65. Many workplaces provide free flu vax
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It's free here for everyone who is a resident of the province which is anyone who has been here for 90 days and can get a health card. That said I've never used it. The one last season was completely ineffective. The only person I know who kept getting the flu vaccine was my grandfather. To be honest it made him ill after every shot.
 
There is a grown man at work who has yoda ring tones that tell him to "press the button you must..."

Can't he use vibrate?
 
What is so fascinating with California lifestyle? Gated communities, the constant sun, the massive palatial houses that need a horde of Hispanic servants to maintain. Where are the tall buildings? Where is the hustle and bustle? What's with all the driving? Where are the cramped sidewalks and café or bistro patios that spill over to the side of the street?
 
Fwiffo said:
What is so fascinating with California lifestyle? Gated communities, the constant sun, the massive palatial houses that need a horde of Hispanic servants to maintain. Where are the tall buildings? Where is the hustle and bustle? What's with all the driving? Where are the cramped sidewalks and café or bistro patios that spill over to the side of the street?
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You've sold it to me....what's the rate and when do we start?
 
I've been in a bit of a depressed mood for the past week. Today someone remembered to message me and I automatically perk up seeing her flash on my mobile. I go through the work day and I am depressed again after 10 hours but I bump into some woman I met in a class and I'm smiling, happy, emoting with body language. Then when we have to part I am depressed again.

I get into a funk when my mobile doesn't flash for hours at a time.
 
You need interesting exercise or you'll stay depressed. Treadmill in your building's gym won't cut it. Join a local football league.
 
LelandJ said:
You need interesting exercise or you'll stay depressed. Treadmill in your building's gym won't cut it. Join a local football league.
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I'm not that person who gets addicted to endorphins or adrenaline or whatever. I don't get a workout glow - well, after an hour on the elliptical (not treadmill) I'm mostly a sweaty mess. I'm tired. And I can't metabolize alcohol as much no matter how many hours I wait.
 
Fwiffo said:
I've been in a bit of a depressed mood for the past week. Today someone remembered to message me and I automatically perk up seeing her flash on my mobile. I go through the work day and I am depressed again after 10 hours but I bump into some woman I met in a class and I'm smiling, happy, emoting with body language. Then when we have to part I am depressed again.

I get into a funk when my mobile doesn't flash for hours at a time.
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Snap out of it. If Analthor can find a good woman to make him an honest man the is hope for you!
 
Thruth said:
Snap out of it. If Analthor can find a good woman to make him an honest man the is hope for you!
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Is this the 1950s? A wife is all I need!? I think I said I was in need of being around people. I just tend to confide and have closer relationships with women.

Refer me to a psychologist or a mental health specialist or whatever.
 
Fwiffo said:
Is this the 1950s? A wife is all I need!? I think I said I was in need of being around people. I just tend to confide and have closer relationships with women.

Refer me to a psychologist or a mental health specialist or whatever.
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It was written that way to get just that assumption out of you.

Arnathor found what he wanted and so can you.

No one is advocating marriage for you

I think a Persian escort on retainer is more for you
 
Thruth said:
It was written that way to get just that assumption out of you.

Arnathor found what he wanted and so can you.

No one is advocating marriage for you

I think a Persian escort on retainer is more for you
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Is this another trick? You know I never work for something or someone I already have. Once I get it, I stop valuing it and then I just abuse it because I already have it.
 
Fwiffo said:
Is this another trick? You know I never work for something or someone I already have. Once I get it, I stop valuing it and then I just abuse it because I already have it.
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nope. completely honest. you pay indirectly for discontinuous companionship which is why you should step up to direct pay companionship. all th pros of Prsians without the crazy, yippy, psycho qualities
 
Thruth said:
nope. completely honest. you pay indirectly for discontinuous companionship which is why you should step up to direct pay companionship. all th pros of Prsians without the crazy, yippy, psycho qualities
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Is this a philosophical discussion? Everyone pays something. No one is completely altruistic.

I had an escort hit on me and buy me drinks after her appointment was cancelled and her driver left her stranded there. Nothing about her was genuine. Her back story kept changing too. Sure all the men at the bar were jealous but it meant nothing to me.
 
Fwiffo said:
Is this a philosophical discussion? Everyone pays something. No one is completely altruistic.

I had an escort hit on me and buy me drinks after her appointment was cancelled and her driver left her stranded there. Nothing about her was genuine. Her back story kept changing too. Sure all the men at the bar were jealous but it meant nothing to me.
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No, it is a "you whine when you got'em and whine when you don't got'em" thing. Hookers are just the thing for you
 
I neglected to take this lady and her cougar friends up to my men's only club because I missed an e-mail on my mobile. I told her let's set a date and I'll take you there instead of you randomly messaging me from some bar that you want to go on a whim. Last week she goes there by herself with another woman. A men's only club where there are no female bathrooms except the one for female employees. She tried to pay for drinks and the bartender (who obviously knows me) puts it all on my club account. I have no idea how she found it given the directory for the lift has companies and residences listed up to the 10th floor and the club is on the 11th floor.
 
LelandJ said:
Probably the internet.
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It still doesn’t explain why you want to go there unaccompanied. If she took the wrong turn she would be staring at a bunch of men showering and the sauna.
 
Fwiffo said:
It still doesn’t explain why you want to go there unaccompanied. If she took the wrong turn she would be staring at a bunch of men showering and the sauna.
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Did you just answer your own question there?
 
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